Dear 2015

Thank you for our second year in Italy with still a lot of memorable first-time experiences:

Becoming a ‘lice parent’ (luizenouder) for the first time. Thank you YouTube for showing the muppets what lice are and what they do. While I was sorting them out in the hair of the heads of two muppets. Again. And again. And again. For ten days. Thank you for this `testing my patience-experience´.

A little happy three-year-old muppet can learn Italian in a couple of months. Apparently. And he can tell his kindergarten teacher fluently: ‘You have the same coat as my mommy!’ In Italian, of course. He can even talk to Dutch people in Italian without them realising that he is Dutch. Thank you for these little muppets’ language experiences.

Two people who are living a 1000 km away, can stand on my doorstep. All of a sudden. Although my brain does not accept that, nor understand that, at least for one hour. The biggest surprise being that these two people were my parents. And that it was on my birthday. Thank you for this mind-shaking surprise.

‘Mama, ik vind je lief! / Mommy I love you!’, is always nice to hear, and incredibly special (needed!) when you are cleaning up the mess of a feverish, vomiting little kid. As is singing after such a session. And dancing on ‘Linkerbeen, rechterbeen, draai maar om de ander heen.’ In the middle of the night. Of course. Thank you, little love.

In my opinion there is nothing to like about hurk wc’s (squat toilets). Even though I am not pregnant anymore and there is no need to be afraid of rolling around like a giant snowball of hormones in...yuck...I do not even want to mention that. But unfortunately there are lots of these hole-in-the-floor-toilets in Italy. Too many at least. So, no words of thanks here.

Travelling with a baby fills me with gratitude because of all the helpful people crossing my path. The gentle Italian man who shouted: ‘Una mama con un bambino, lasciala passare per favore!’. While his daughter took the stroller I was carrying for the baby, he took my suitcase to carry it and I could of course carry my own piccolo. And this is just one of many examples. Grazie mille, signori e signore!

It is quite comforting when your muppets are telling you: ‘Mommy, you are doing the best you can!’ when you get lost – again – driving around in Italy. Or any other moment when you are apologising for not being the perfect mom or person in their world at that time. There is nothing better than getting lost together. And always finding your way somewhere. Together.

We are definitely past the point of feeling ashamed when ordering Dutch food from family or friends from the Netherlands who are coming over. For example: pindakaas, hagelslag, peperkoek, oude kaas, komijnenkaas, sandwichspread, stroopwafels (we are eating more of them with friends here than we used to back in the Netherlands), pepernoten, speculaas. In the first year abroad you miss them secretly and try to get hold of the stuff via the backdoor. During the second year abroad you miss them, less intense but also feeling less ashamed about it. Thank you for the acknowledgement and letting go of shame. At least at this point.

Skyping is one digital, but lovely way to catch up with family and friends living all over the world. You can drink a cup of tea together, dance while being apart together, pretend you are shopping together and feel the energy of the other one via the screen. And have a good personal talk. Although it is never totally the real thing, of course. Thank you, you all know who you are. Even if it was only once.

Cappuccino and brioches, lunches, aperitivi and dinners are still a nice way to combine Italian cuisine with lovely company. Luckily there are friends from all over the world accompanying us here: Thank you, grazie mille, gracias, obrigado, danke schön, kiitos, tak, ευχαριστίες, hvala, dankjewel!

I am looking forward to healthy, surprising, gentle, kind, multimedial, shameless first-time experiences during next year. And fewer squat toilets. Per favore.